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literature
Did I Mention the Sun...
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Literature Text
Orpella will sit and carefully knit, while
blooms of white gather to make amends.
When calluses wore and painfully tore, infantile,
comfort was displayed within; it depends
on stolen Inverness cape.
Scents of lilacs do permeate well, float
and fall quite well, upon ready intake of air.
She followed her man to end of his days, till bloat
posies in hand, without any care,
poker-faced St. Peter awaits.
Inveigled by time, remaining by proxy,
Orpella cloaks so many, numbers fail mettle.
Her steadfast allegiance, staid orthodoxy,
crown her centerpiece amid glorious petals.
.....Bar the garden, Orpella!
Her chair emptied in time, holding out
invite to another, dedicated.
Should they deign to collar their doubt,
flowers involved, predicated.
.....Whence came caution, Orpella?
blooms of white gather to make amends.
When calluses wore and painfully tore, infantile,
comfort was displayed within; it depends
on stolen Inverness cape.
Scents of lilacs do permeate well, float
and fall quite well, upon ready intake of air.
She followed her man to end of his days, till bloat
posies in hand, without any care,
poker-faced St. Peter awaits.
Inveigled by time, remaining by proxy,
Orpella cloaks so many, numbers fail mettle.
Her steadfast allegiance, staid orthodoxy,
crown her centerpiece amid glorious petals.
.....Bar the garden, Orpella!
Her chair emptied in time, holding out
invite to another, dedicated.
Should they deign to collar their doubt,
flowers involved, predicated.
.....Whence came caution, Orpella?
My thanks to for the wonderful stock photo by:
:draper_111_by_Voivodess_Stock:
Enjoy.
"Did I Mention the Sun and Her Children?"
:draper_111_by_Voivodess_Stock:
Enjoy.
"Did I Mention the Sun and Her Children?"
© 2008 - 2024 Hoodimann
Comments9
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This is an enjoyable poem for the flow and internal rhyming. Diction, too, is great! The only negative thing--and it's not negative, really--is this line:
and fall so well, upon ready intake of air
Based off of grammar rules I'v learned, the context in which you use the "so" should be followed by a "that clause." (Example: float/and fall so well THAT...) If you do this, though, I think your flow and rythm will get messed up, so replacing the word with something else like "quite" can work. Yet, I'm not too sure how "quite" suites your fancy and the poem itself... =/
and fall so well, upon ready intake of air
Based off of grammar rules I'v learned, the context in which you use the "so" should be followed by a "that clause." (Example: float/and fall so well THAT...) If you do this, though, I think your flow and rythm will get messed up, so replacing the word with something else like "quite" can work. Yet, I'm not too sure how "quite" suites your fancy and the poem itself... =/